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December 10, 2009 1:25 PM

When Money Worries Keep You Stuck

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May 14th seemed a normal enough day. But my stomach was churning. I needed to spend the summer working on The Self Employment Telesummit, but I didn’t know how to do that and keep cash flow going. I felt stuck. I was so anxious I didn’t even want to look at the numbers.

If you’ve ever tried to design a product, write a marketing message, or talk about your work when you’re worried about money, you know how it ties you up in knots. Your stomach hurts and your head swims. And all the while you are leaning on yourself because you know that your emotional response is not helping.

Almost every teacher about money says the way to change things is to start with a clear picture of your current finances. But they're wrong. They don't tell you that you're about to be getting on an emotional roller coaster that comes with getting all the information together. I think that's why so many people hate to do this.

Yet still, they just say you have to. But you don't. There's a better way:

When anxiety about money keeps you from seeing clearly, the first job is to reduce the anxiety. One way to do this is to set up what Robert Fritz calls dynamic tension, an essential element of creating any result in life.

Dynamic tension is what happens when we have a clear picture, not only of current reality, but also of where we want to end up. This tension draws us forward, impelling us to make the choices that narrow the gap between the two.

To create this dynamic tension, start with the big picture of how you want things to be. Imagine yourself at peace financially. Feel what that is like. Notice how things in your life shift. Then start making notes about specific things that have changed now that you are free of financial worries. You might write down things like:

  • I invest in a retirement account every month.
  • I put aside 25% of my income for taxes without stress or strain.
  • I have a generous budget for personal development.

Be as complete and specific as you can, building a detailed picture of the reality you want to create. As you work, allow yourself to see, hear, feel what life is like in this desired reality.

When you have clearly defined what you want to create, you can begin gathering information about the current state of affairs. Take your time, reminding yourself as you work that this is part of closing the gap between where you are and where you want to be. Instead of being in indictment of what is, the current state of affairs becomes a stepping stone on the way to your goals.

Setting up this dynamic tension changes the way you feel about yourself and money. Instead of being at the mercy of your situation, you are a creator working with what is to create what will be. It’s a powerful shift.

In the case of the Telesummit, I focused on the experience I was creating for self-employed people. As I became clearer and clearer about the value, I realized I could pre-sell tickets to a select group of people. Problem solved.

Well, actually, the problem still wasn’t solved. I had an idea, but I was still anxious, and putting the idea to work felt hard. I needed more help.

I turned to two tools that are making a big difference in my life these days: The Emotional Freedom Technique (EFT) and The Work of Byron Katie. Using these tools to undo money worries gave me the peace and confidence I needed to move forward.

I know I’m not the only one who suffers from anxiety about money, so I created a super-simple self study program. Undoing Money Worries includes an ebook, cheat sheets, and videos that show you exactly how to use these tools to free yourself from negative thoughts and feelings so you can create the changes you want.

It’s a very simple program and very effective. For me and my clients, it makes the difference between staying stuck and doing what you need to do to free up your finances.

Click here to learn more about how Undoing Money Worries can help.

Peace,

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Molly

PS: It can be daunting to learn a knew process all by yourself. If you order Undoing Money Worries before December 31, you’re invited to a teleconference demonstrating both EFT and The Work with time for Q&A. The teleconference will be recorded so you can use it over and over again. The teleconference will be on Friday, January 8, 2010, at 10am Pacific time.

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Comments

Well, bless your heart Molly! As I was reading through your post, I kept thinking "I wonder if she knows about EFT"? I'm a dedicated practitioner of Emotional Freedom Technique and find it can really clear the way for much of what Shaboom teaches. Thanks for being so upfront about your OWN worries-nice to know we've ALL had them! Warmly, Sue

Posted by: Sue Burness at December 13, 2009 8:51 AM

Small world, Sue. I love that the post brought EFT to mind. I'm glad that you can add your voice to the chorus about how effective EFT can be on money worries.

Posted by: Molly Gordon at December 14, 2009 2:00 PM

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